What is counselling?

Counselling is when a counsellor sees a client in a private and confidential setting to explore a difficulty the client is having, distress they may be experiencing or perhaps their dissatisfaction with life or their current circumstances. It is always at the request of the client and no one can properly be 'sent' for counselling.

By listening attentively and patiently, the counsellor can begin to perceive the difficulties from the client's point of view and can help them to see things more clearly, possibly from a slightly different angle. Counselling is a way of facilitating choice or change or reducing confusion.

In counselling, the relationship between the client and the counsellor is an essential part of the process. As trust is built up, the counsellor will encourage the clients to look at aspects of their lives; their relationships and themselves, which they may not have thought of or felt able to face before. Bottled-up feelings such as anger, anxiety, grief and embarrassment can become very intense. The counsellor will encourage the expression of these feelings, thus making them easier for the client to understand.

There may be some exploration of early relationships to discover how they came to react to certain people or situations in certain ways that contribute to their difficulties, followed by consideration of ways in which they might change. The counsellor may set out the options open to clients and help them to follow whichever one they choose. The counsellor may help the client to examine in detail the situations or behaviours which are proving troublesome and to find a small but crucial point where it would be possible to initiate some change as a start.

Whatever approach the counsellor uses, and these are only examples, the ultimate aim is for the client to make their own choices, and to put them into action.

Is counselling different from psychotherapy?

There is a great deal of overlap between these 'talking therapies' and the skills used are very similar. Both can help to deal with problems in a fresh way. Counselling tends to focus on a specific life problem, while psychotherapy tends to deal with more deep-seated personal issues which may bring about really profound changes. Fortunately, the distinction between counselling and psychotherapy is not a matter which need greatly concern anyone seeking help. Most practitioners of either activity, before any commitment is made on either side, will want to be sure that the help they can offer is appropriate for the individual concerned.

Choosing the right counsellor

The final judge of whether a counsellor is right for you can only be yourself and you must trust your own instincts. Talk to the counsellor first and then ask yourself if you would feel comfortable telling this person intimate details of your life. Do you feel safe with them? do you like their manner towards you and could you be completely open with them? Personal recommendation from someone you respect is a good start but counselling is very personal and you may not get on with someone even your best friend finds suitable. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) produces the 'Counselling & Psychotherapy Resources Directory' in which counsellors who abide by a reputable Code of Ethics & Practice are listed together with some voluntary organisations and self-help groups.
There is also an Association of Christian Counsellors (ACC) with it’s own Code of Ethics which some people may find a useful alternative source of information.

Finding a Counsellor

The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) represents counselling at national and international levels. It aims to promote counselling throughout society and to raise standards of training and practice. BACP has developed excellent Codes of Ethics and Practice for counsellors, counselling trainers, the supervision of counsellors and counselling skills. The organisation provides support for counsellors and those using counselling skills working in areas such as education, medical settings, the workplace, etc. plus a supporting network of local branches.

BACP can provide a list of resources available in their locality. Please write sending an A5 SAE. for their Counselling & Psychotherapy Resources Directory. beat Helplines can also help you to find counsellors in your local area, using our HelpFinder directory. The beat Youthline is staffed by trained counsellors who can provide limited telephone counselling services for people 18 and under.

Where can you get counselling and how much will it cost?

There is some counselling available on the NHS and while there are some Clinical Psychology Departments which will take self referral, most depend on referral from your GP. It is worth finding out if your doctor can refer you to a counsellor. For young people still studying, most universities and colleges have a student counselling service and some schools have counsellors available.

There are a number of voluntary or charitable organisations which offer free counselling or ask only for a donation towards costs. Included in this category are independent agencies which are affiliated to umbrella organisations such as the youth counselling (National Association for Young Peoples Counselling and Advice Services). Also offering specialist counselling services are specialist, national bodies such as the Alcohol Counselling Service, RELATE (Marriage guidance) and Cruse (Bereavement).

There are also local counselling services with a charitable base which are more variable in their distribution.
An increasing number of counsellors and psychotherapists are working in private practice and their charges will range from about £15-£50 per session for individual counselling. Group sessions can work out cheaper.

How long will it take?

This depends on you, the counsellor and the problem. While deep rooted problems like eating disorders may need longer (one hour a week for several months) short term counselling for a specific problem or later follow up may take only a few weekly sessions.

Books giving an introduction to counselling

• Counselling & Psychotherapy - Is it for me?’ by Hetty Einzig obtainable from BACP
• Room to listen room to talk by Tony Lake and Fran Acheson - Bedford Square Press
• Talking to a stranger - A consumers' guide to therapy’ by Lindsay Knight - Fontana
• The best counselling guide by Susan Quilliarn and Ian Gorve-Stephensen - Thorsons

More Information

Much of the information on this page was supplied by

The British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy
1 Regent Place, Rugby, Warwickshire, CV2 I 2PJ
Information Line 0870 443 5252 Office: 01788 550 899 Fax: 01788 562 189

The Association of Christian Counsellors
29 Momus Boulevard, Coventry CV2 5NA
Tel: 0845 124 9569/70 Fax No: 0845 124 9571
e-mail office@acc-uk.org