Lying to parents

hey sweetheart,

I think you have to tell them when it feels right for you. and when you tell them be honest about what you do/don't want them to do as they will only want to help you, but everyone gets it wrong sometimes, and you may need to point them in the right direction.

let me know how you are doing gorgeous,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

hi i only 13 but i know what it like to lying to your mum and dad because i do this all the time and i don't like doing it .but now they know what going on which is so much better. it mine help to have some one to talk to about your ed? i have anor and bulima so i know how hard it is

i here for you if you want to talk?

take care

hi i only 13 but i know what it like to lying to your mum and dad because i do this all the time and i don't like doing it .but now they know what going on which is so much better. it mine help to have some one to talk to about your ed? i have anor and bulima so i know how hard it is

i here for you if you want to talk?

take care

Hello,

I'm also 23, and also bulimic and to be honest, you need to tell your parents, lying will make you feel worse and it's all so difficult to remember what you've told to who, believe me! I have only recently told my parents about my ED, within the last few months abd to begin with, I have to say it was SO tough, my mum kinda always had her suspicions but my dad reacted badly, and yes it was like being watched like a hawk when they first found out but gradually we have learnt to be honest with other andI have been on the waiting list for psycho therapeutic treatment for a while and my Dad has helped me chase referrals etc so that we can get this sorted once and for all.

I found it particularly difficult because I am a triplet, I have an identical sister and my other triplet is a brother, to begin with my sister thought I was just 'attention seeking' but then when I sat down and explained to her what I was feeling and how making myself sick was quite extreme 'attention seeking' she realised how I felt and has since been really supportive.

If you decide to tell them it will be difficult at first but they are your parent's, they are there to support you, I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide to do. Please keep me up to date.

Take Care

Kat xx

hey sweetheart,

thank you gorgeous,

I will talk if I need to thanks hun,

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

I've had eating problems for along time, and I hid it from my parent, not because I didnt think they could cope really. But because I dont particularly want to change I guess...I know what I'm doing is bad for me, but its me...how I cope. And its that part i dont think my parents would understand...I want to be different...but i dont want to change...does that make any sense at all?  I'm just really confused at the moment...

hey sweetheart,

yes that does make sense.

hope you are okay gorgeous?

take care,

lexy -xxx-

Sunlight, that makes perfect sense - that is exactly how I feel right now. My mum and some close loved ones know about me because I told me.. but i still find it hard to be honest about how I feel.. i still pretend everythings fine when its not, just out of habit and also because I feel people expect me to be OK.

I cant stop trying to live up to other peoples expectations, no matter how hard I try. when I stop doing that.. when I just be me, I feel too vulnerable. Like showing weakness. And I just put up my front again. cos thats all I know.

Its frustratiing as hell

My parents knew when I got an eating disorder at age 11 and they have noticed everytime it has happened since but they are really supportive and help me, but last year when I was at uni I tried to hide it from them as I felt ashamed that I was having problems and I ended up so ill that I came home. I got too ill to lie to them about anything and went to hospital but now its much better and I feel our relationships is so much stronger xxxx

Thats exactly how I feel, I'm pretty clever and level headed and thats how people see me. But the way I see food and treat it has nothing to do with being reasonable and sensable... But because people see me as being that way I can't show them that actually I'm really struggling. I know they love me, and they'd accept it and try to help me, but my parents are the type of people who see a problem and then fix it. I dont even know what is broken let alone how to fix it, its not like I've had a terrible experience or anything....this is part of me, but I hate feeling this way to...Do you think of food constantly as well?

yes I do - sorry I can't say more at the moment sunlight.

hope you are okay?

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Wow, it's so wierd when you realise that other people are here explaining exactly the way you feel. You think no one understands and then at the same time there are so many people who do.

Sunlight, when you said about wanting to be different but not change. I feel the same. I'm intelligent and im sensible, yet even though i know my relationship with food isn't, its just totally different and hasnt got anything to do with how sensible i am.

I don't want to change, people have always seen me as the happy, bubbly old me, but i just don't feel like that anymore. I'm 16 and doing gcses, exams suck!

Take care :)

xXx Berny xXx

hey berny

this is a fantastic place to talk to people =)

welcome to the boards x

I know what you mean about not wanting to change - its almost like I've accepted that this is me now.

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Yeah I totally agree Berny, there is part of me, that is totally seperate from my ED. Rational and sensible, and already knows all the stuff that people advise me to do, or think. But then my ED can feel just as much as part of me as that, I feel that its not just a coping mechanism I guess.I know that my ED isnt 'me', but it is a part of me. Does that make any sense? lol Yeah exams and coursework always suck :-)

Thanks Lexy :) I don't want to change as a person, but theres that part of me that wants to change physically :-(

And sunlight, I know that its not rational and its not healthy and its not good. But don't we all? But something inside fights against all rational thoughts, all thoughts telling me i dont need to, telling me its only damaging me, but why doesnt it stop me?

I had geography exam this morning. It was ok I suppose!! Although I hate geography!

Take care :-)

xXx Berny xXx

I remember doing my GCSEs and being so stressed out as the teachers expected a lot from me, but you don't need the best grades to get jobs! And I did much better than I thought.

I am clever too and intelligent but even when I knew how much I was damaging myself that didn't make me it, I can eat now but my weight is still very low and I know what you mean when you say that the anorexia isn't you, it's like something that has got a hold of me, I can be totally normal with my mates and everyday life but it's just that I have something inside me like a voice that tries to make me not eat. xxxxxx

hey sweetheart,

you're welcome - I don't know what to say now though I'm afraid

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Emma, yea there is a lot expected of me as well not only from others but I expect a lot from myself and I can just feel I will be dissapointed with my results! But I'm doing going to worry about them until I need to! And also I can be just totally normal with my mates and everyone, as you said. It's also not as though I don't eat, because I don't tend to restrict.

Altough recently I've been not eating an awful lot then when it comes to certain mealtimes and I have to eat, i've been purging. no one seems to ever notice.

Hey Lexy, not to worry. Am I right in getting the impression that you're not doing great at the moment? Stay strong,

Keep in touch,

xXx Berny xXx

hey sweetheart,

I'm not doing fantastic - even my neighbours have been questioning my mum about things unfortunately.

I'm trying to stay strong,

let me know how things are going,

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Yeah I expected a lot from myself too and I revised way to much, even when I got all A and A* I thought I could have got more A* and now I look back and think that is ridiculous and I don't need that good grades for a job! You can still get into uni, I got good grades but wish I would have socialised more but anorexia has stopped me, so now I've given up education and just want a job when I am better anywhere nice, I'm not that bothered about pay!!! But don't worry about exams, just enjoy summer and you will get what you deserve xxx

Hey Lexy, sorry to hear about that, do you know why things are bad for you at the moment? Does anything inparticular make things worse or is that just the way it goes for you?

Emma, I get the feeling that when I get my results back i'll look at them and just go: "yea probably should have done some revision then eh?" I used to be really hard working, now i find it really really hard to get myself to work! I'm hoping for maybe a couple of A*s, A's and B's, I did my maths a year early so that's already an A* on the cards, but I am most certainly looking forward to the summer!

Take care all

xXx Berny xXx

hey sweetheart,

not really. was diagnosed with ibs today as well which makes eating more difficult, especially considering I dont want to eat as it is.

hope you are okay??

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Oh sunlight, I know exactly what your going through. I am 2 bulimic and 20 yrsold and I cant tell my parents either and ive lied to them on many occasion unfortunatly. I am also A CHRISTIAN which I am proud of and my family is also, im worried that if they knew they'd think I was less of a christian because this shouldnt happen 2 a 'real' christian or i should be able to fight it.

Im sorry I have no advice for you but I can say that ur not alone and I totally get what your saying and how hard it is.

Let me know how it wrks out if it does.

God Bless

Steph

Oh sunlight, I know exactly what your going through. I am 2 bulimic and 20 yrsold and I cant tell my parents either and ive lied to them on many occasion unfortunatly. I am also A CHRISTIAN which I am proud of and my family is also, im worried that if they knew they'd think I was less of a christian because this shouldnt happen 2 a 'real' christian or i should be able to fight it.

Im sorry I have no advice for you but I can say that ur not alone and I totally get what your saying and how hard it is.

Let me know how it wrks out if it does.

God Bless

Steph

I'm so glad im not the only one who feels like this!! Its like I'm leaving my family down.  And its not something that somone else has done, its me. How are you doing at the moment???

Emzy

since i was diagnosed 7 months ago with an eating disorder my parents have been reli supportive but i still find it reli hard 2 tell dem things i do n used 2 do. They dont no i still check calorie amounts on packets n dat i used 2 throw away food they gave me n i used to do excess exercisin n i dont no if i eva will tell them. What shud i do? shud i just 4get d past? do dey expect me 2 still be  checkin calories??! xx

hey sweetheart,

they should know it wont go away overnight and i think they probs know more than they let on about tbh.

sorry not to be much help,

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

p.s. try to be as honest as possible

aww thx 4 ur help its reli gr8 4 ur support ill try n tell them wen i feel its rite howz things goin 4 u atm?xx