recovering bulimia

Hey,

That is a great story, thanks! You seem a very strong person and your very inspirational to be able to overcome this.

I am recovering from bulimia at the moment....well not exactly recovering cause im not improving at all. I can completely relate to you when you say about bulimia being 'your dirty secret'. Same here although its not exactly my secret anymore  . . . wish it was though.

Thank you for offering your help to all of us, it really is great to hear that people can come through this, it gives me hope! If you ever need anything then im here too!

Love Roxy xxxxxx

Aww i know sweetheart and my whole family ended up knowing and made me feel more ashamed. my sister printed out tons of bulimia books about what it was doing to me and threw it all over my bedroom which really upset me more because i knew the dangers but there is so much more to it mentally. you have to be completely ready to make the change and dont put any pressure on yourself to do so until you are ready. its ok to not be making progress as long as mentally your thinking more positively and making changes in other aspects of your life that give you control, mine was driving and getting into university. think positively about how you know you will over come it one day and that will bleive it or not will come.

 Dont worry about getting proffessional help, its no the only way, you can do it without as long as you research what to eat. little and often and varied is the key and i hardly put any weight on and feel more energised and happy for it.

I found talking to people you can trust about it, ask advice and tel them how you want to change to get support. youl get there sweetheart, dont rush it. 

 xxxxxxxxxx

I think that is my main problem, im not ready to get better. I cannot tell you how much this is hurting me.

Nobody understands, they keep saying to me 'do you know what you are doing to yourself?' and i tell them that i do know, but i still cant stop

I am already getting professional help, have been for the past 4 months. Its not as bad as i had thought, though sometimes i do wish i did not see the professionals just because it means that i have to get better because they are pushing me the whole time.

I am starting to think more positively although i still have very very bad days more often than not. I just kind of feel that i am waiting around the whole time. I have no purpose to be here anymore, i have nothing to do apart from appointments and sitting in lessons not beoing able to concentrate.

Anyway sorry about that, just kind of went off on one then! How are you hun? Are you doing anything nice over the weekend?

Love Roxy xxxxxxxx

you dont have to tel me babe because i know, it consumes ya n it ends up bein all ya can think of. i hated it, n even like overcomming it, idont perge anymore but stil feel i have eaten too much and have to stop myself but it gets better i assure u. and dont appologise! bless ya heart.

yeah they used to say it to me all the time n im like give me a break, ya c at first my family pushed me bt realised it made it worse so left me n i came round on my own, the worst thing is feeling pressured. bless ya. just remember dont do it until your ready dont put pressure on yourself n try not to let anyone else do so.

Its horrible noone understanding. but i do so if ya ever wanna vent or let it out im here 

 yeah i felt really really low like i was worthless, honestly i was on the verge and looking back now i cant beleive how low the whole illness made me, i think its because i felt trapped with nowhere to turn. im 100% happier now and you wil be 2 when u get there chick.

not much really been soooo board today lol. going for a drink tonight i think and family coming tomorrow and start new summer job on monday but not too bad lol, what about yourself sweetie

xxxxxxx

Im glad you understand...i actaully don't know what i would do without these boards!

Im very jealous that you are feeling so much happier now! I know you have been through everything i have but i want to get better NOW!! i don't want to wait, just wish i could click my fingers and it all be ok....but no, got to wait for ages and ages for that to happen, and it may not even happen at all.

Oo, i was just about to say GOOD LUCK for the job, but realised that you posted this sat and its monday today....so you started today??!!!?? How did it go?

I so desperately need a job, im going to have to go around tomorrow and hand my CV into a couple of places but the thought of that just scares me so much! Stupid i no.

Take care,

Love Roxy xxxxxxxx

im not always happy, sometimes i just wanna eat but i havnt looked back and every week that goes by it gets easier, the hardest thing is the first three weeks sweetheart but its so easy after that. its just knowin what to have and when to introduce new things. the hardest thing is not knowing what to expect your body to do lol.

it will happent though, i wanted so bad to click my fingers lol n to just b better. it wil happen because it sounds like you really want it and one day wou wil want it so bad youl set a date and just do it, you seem like me in the way i was thinking before i grabbed the bull by the horns n went for it. have faith in yourself x

aww thanks, yeah it went really wel actually its hard work though but good money.

yeah thats what i did, tis scary but ya feel good after ya dun it, i sent letters around with my cv as wel and thats how this job came up lol. havin a job makes you feel in routine n in control which helps.

 what are you doing this weekend then sweetie? how are you feeling today? xxxxx

Hey,

Im feeling ok thanks. SO tired though , i am literally falling asleep at this computer!

Im glad the job went well, you really deserve it hun. I handed my CV into one place in the end, that is all i could face but i havn't heard back from them yet so i suppose thats not too good, o well. Perhaps i could try letters, and yer i agree having a routine is so good. Is the job still going well?

I had a really good weekend actually, it was so positive and nice! How was yours?

Take care,

Love Roxy xxxxxxxxx