update

Hiya My name is Jenny I suffer with anorexia although getting better now!

Just thought I would say Hi!!!!!!!!

I think it is so amazing that you want to get better!! Good Luck hun! Sure you will do great! You sound amazingly strong!

Love Jennyxxxx

heya

i read u wr inpatient

sorry it came to tht but glad u feel its helpin u - it sounds like it has - its got u bk to seein its wroth fightin for

u sooo desrev a gd fun filled life free of ED

u wer 1 of first ppl spoke to me on here n i neva forget tht

things here r goin gd

i had a bit of a set bk a couple of months ago but i hav got bk to bein ok again - my eating is near enuf normal agen with very few problems its just mentaly stil a way togo sum days

but overall im doin really well - i feel happy again i am enjoyin life living it again - been so busy this week - iv been out everyday this week socialisin invited to soo many fings - soo tired tho lol and its ment a hell of a lot of eatin out so thats been tough espec today as ate out with mum n then to dinner party both full on cooked meals but i did it n i feel fine - as they kept sayin wen i sed o well i ate out at lunch tthey wer like sooooo - they kno nuffin bout my past either as they r relatively new frends wer i used to work

i left my job tho as couldnt hak it any longer so out of work for a wile its been nice i had a interview for new job 2day it went well and i realised im mor confident now and im not so scared of new fings so i feel soon i shal b bk to fun luvin life i led b4

anyway chik hope u r well? u seem tht altho fings arnt perfect u kno tht u want to get betta now? n u got the right help ther for u?

i sooo hope u do

binging and purgin takes alot to contol i kno i found tht even if i did it 1 less tmy a day tht was an achievment n even if i didnt succeed in tht the fact i tryed to and had the motivation to is summit to b proud of

i found it eva so hard to stop it all but i realised altho i cant replace tht feelin i can put in place a feelin tht gives me freedom too - music helps me get away from it all walkin too and talkin to sum frends

im goin on i apologise - i been to dinner part n drinkin a bit but i still tlk sense and mean wat i say

u take care i apologise for bein distant not writin but i fink it was about the tym u went into inpatient i had a bad week or so n ended up in real troubel and from then only used boards in desperate tyms n a few messages here n ther - no excuse i kno sorry hun u take care keep strong keep fightin it is worht it i promis xxxxxx

Sweetie...I had no idea you were an inpatient :(

My apologises hunni. But you seem to be making good progress...actually I'm so proud of you, you are doing amazingly! I have been discharged from my clinic and therapists so technically I have recovered. Although I did purge last night. I'm ashamed of myself for it.

Keep going love, you will beat this. 3 years is longer than me and if I managed to fight I know you can.

Love you hunni
Sophie
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

heya

thanks for replies...

hee lollypop this is gonna sound so sad lol but i actually printed off some of my first posts from like 2 years ago lol and yep some of the amazing replies were from u hehe......i m so glad your doing a bit better to sweety , things for me are nt really any betta ED wise but i m happier and i ve got my motivation back to get better so i guess with some hard work things will move in a betta direction soon enough...no need to apoligise hun i mm glad i went inpatient to its a horrible rollercoaster of ups and downs but hopefully tis is the start of something betta take care xxx

sophstar hunny i cant believe i forgot to put ur name in my original post i m so proud of you for being discharged there are so many new girls on the board it feel like old ones hav dissapeared but you've been getting betta oh hun i m so proud for youdne be ashamed for purging infact i m having an awful day myself ( i fve just come home from unit for weekend) but its ok tomorrows another day lotsa love xxx

jenny...heya how are you ?? it was nice of you to say hi lol i hope your ok, i might sound strong sweety but to be honest i m not ,

feel free to post back swwet

xxx

Hi,

I would like to talk to you...

I went inpatient at a unit in wales for a few months last year because of my depression and my weight, so we have something in common. I wasn't ready to be discharged though, but they did it anyway :(

I am still in the grip of my ED, which i would say is a mixture of ED's, so i will say that i have half anorexia and half ED-NOS, and i'm also 17.

I'm really pleased that you're getting better - well done :)

stay strong,

-xxx- lillies

ohh sweetie im so glad that you have posted and that you have got that motivation bk. i constantly find and loose that feeling of choosing life over this..but it keeps you going to know that recovery takes time has ups and downs but will be worth it in the end yeah!

You are being so couragous.you are a survivor- proud of you- keep going.

Things are up and down with me,getting really helpful therapy tho and think we are bth learning so much.

loveyou lots lottie/xx

hey lottielou - as long as u r happier n got the motivation ther the rest will fit in wen ur in the right frame of mind too but u got the right attitude to n u will beat it

ye things here all gd most of the tym  n hav a life bk altho last nyt they all seemed to vanish on a nyt out leavin me alone n not sayin a dam word but o well thts my frends for u im used to it now (sigh)

u keep battlein hard n keep tht motivation up do wats best for u we all kno bein forced into summit dunt help much

sophstar - ther is nuffin to b ashamed of - purging happens stil wen ur in recovery its unfortunately part n parcel of recoverin as long as it doesnt form as a big tym habbit agen and a constant fing u will b ok n it doesnt take away any of the hard work uve put it. so no feelin ashamed - u r worth soo much more than it all dunt let it beat ya up - ur human hun its ok. does tht make sense hmmm tiredness

take care keep strong xxxx

lillies- hav u been having help since u left the unit...i live like 150 miles from the one i m in and i m worried about coming home to the services down here but to be honest i think i m not even looking for discharge till september...sorry to hear ur so much in the grip of things...depression is a big part of my ED well something that comes along so i know how u feel sweety wb xxx

chalkybaby /emma..i know what u mean about constantly changing your mind about life....recovery is hard i m having a bad few days, but to be honest i ve come to accept that bad days happen, and i ve been tolkd that i might neva be fully recovered  but that i can learn to control it and get as much of a normal life back as i can ....and thats what i want hun a life, bulimia may always be a part of me but it does nt have to be me and control everything......i m so glad your getting good therapy u deserve it so much, i m learning alot just like u said lots of love xxxxxxx

Hi,

I lived 120 miles from the one i went to. It has moved further away now, so i now live 150 miles away from it now, the same as you :(

I've said to my school nurse and my psychiatric nurse that i don't want to go back to being an inpatient, but today i wouldn't actually mind because i feel so closed in and depressed being at home and at school because i have a lot of problems both ends.

I do get help, but i only see someone once a week, which isn't enough for me because i have so much to cope with and i find it hard not speaking to someone everyday, like i did in the unit.

Do you get to go home at the weekends and stuff? I did.

How are you doing?

My ED isn't too good at the moment :(

take care,

-xxx- lillies

hey hunny

yeah i get to go home at weekends and this week i m home on thursday so yay me lol...

um my ED is nt doing to good but i think i hav alot of other mental health issues that kind of get in the way but i m dealing with it hanging in

sweety i def know what u mean about talking everyday i know you dont want to go back inpatient b ut do u think it would help ??are u not able to see people more than once a week??

how are u now , having a better day

wb darling lots of love xxx

Hey sweetie

Keep going...keep smiling and keep strong. You will beat this.

Are you back as a inpatient now? How are you finding it?

Sorry I haven't replied lately. I've been trying to get used to life without my therapists and stuff. I'm finding it a little hard...having a couple of relapses. It's quite scary. But I think I've lost a little weight to be honest. I don't know....I think if my parents saw that they would be mad at me.

I'm not gonna go back to the person I was before. No way.

Let me know how you are...I'm still gonna be here for all of you when I can.

take care gorgeous
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi,

I'm so confused. I don't know whether i want to be an inpatient or not. I don't care whether i end up as an inpatient, but i have no views over whether i want to be an inpatient or not. I;m not making much sense am i? I like being in my own room and having my own space, but at the same time i don't like being stuck around all my problems, so i don't know. I think it would help though, although saying that, it didn't help before.

I'm only allowed to see someone once a week, because i live in a rural area and so there aren't many people around - not good :(. I don't think people realise just how awful i feel.

I'm glad that you get to go home more :)

I have a lot of mental health issues as well, and they all sort of go into each other and make my head a mess.

I'm not very good at the moment. Something is really eating away at me.

take care,

-xxx- lillies