I did so well today, I already felt bad about eating 3 meals, but they were healthy meals and they weren't big portions,but then i couldn'd resisit the temptation to binge, i just drove to the store in a daze and grabbed****and ******of the shelves and went to the till, i felt bad before even eating it and i was almost in tears at the till. everyone must of thought i was really strange for looking so distraught over buying some *****and ****** i felt so concious that everyone was looking at me and making assumptions. i felt sick immediatley after eating it all. i counted the calories which made me feel even worse, im too afraid to write it in my food diary i want to pretend it didnt happen. does anyone else ever feel like this when they binge? Help im so confused i dont understand why i feel so guilty all the time.
banoffexxx
Reply post 1: (No Subject)
written by:banoffepie
posted: 09.05.2008 message:
I wish i could just eat normally and feel not guilty about it, i find myself walking through town looking at other people buying cookies and eating and enjoying them selves and i think lucky them they can eat that without feeling bad afterwards and they probably dont even think about it that much. its just normal to them to eat, to me it feels alien, i feel like i shouldnt be allowed to eat because i have to lose weigh. i hate it its like a vicious circle that i can not get out of. i feel so bad all the time.
banoffexxx
Reply post 2: (No Subject)
written by:staceylouise1
posted: 11.05.2008 message:
Hellow sweety!
I was just looking through the board and realised that nobody had replied to this...i dont get much chance to reply so i am sorry, but i will to you :)
hun your not alone!!! i know what you mean about others eating what they like, and not thinking about it, my 2 closest friends are so thin (but healthy) and eat loadsssssss! And sometimes im sitting there thinking "do you even realise what your doing?" but at the end of the day that's whats "normal".
of course you should be allowed to eat, it's your ed telling you that you shouldnt be, but it's not true! you need to eat to survive!
im really sorry about the way your feeling hun, and i dont really know what to say, but you have to be strong, things will get better. Keep yourself on track hun and dont let anything stop you....take care!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Reply post 3: (No Subject)
written by:butterflies32
posted: 13.05.2008 message:
Heya sweety,
stacylouise is absolutely right. You are not alone and you should be able to eat what you want and wen you want to. From what you wrote it only seems like you ate two things and that is absolutely fine. Eating is not a sin we need to to survive.
I would put it on your food diary. Your therapist will want to know and if you are feeling really bad about it then even more reason for him/her to know so you can talk about it. If you hide it it will only get worse and you will feel worse.
Sweety you probably do not need to lose weight. you are probably a normal healthy weight for your height. Keep going strong.
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