Kill the voice

hey sweetheart,

sounds like a really good idea hunni!!

it's taken me a long time to come up with a name for the voice as I'm not very imaginative lol, but I think mine would be the snake.

It is evil and cunning, whilst being able to slither into corners without being seen by anyone except those who know that it is there.

hope you're doing okay sweetheart,

let me know how you are,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

hi =]

i never really named the voice i had a name for the voice, but i suppose looking back now i would of called it murderer, because that is exactly its aim. I thought it knew what was best for me, but no i did'nt. All it was good for was causing me pain and suffering and it got to the point where i ahd just had enough. I wasn't going to be bullied or "tortured" anymore, it wasn't fair on me and my body. And getting rid of the voice allowed me to be happy again which has helped me see that listening to what people may say about you, gets you no where, you have to love yourselkf for who you are, not what the voice is trying to make you believe. So when you look in that mirror, be proud of who you are, not ashamed because you are beautiful, the voice is the one who is ugly. And don't let it get its way, you are in control, you are the winner! you can beat this!

lots of love,

becky x x x

Hey..mine is a clown.

You know how they think they are so funny but they really arent? More like scary? Well thats my ed.

It laughs at me, it mocks me, it laughs at it's own jokes and judges my every move.

I think to be able to name and shame it is a great idea..just beause we can separate our illness from who we really are.

Take care hun and stay strong-here for you always.

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Hi again :)

Hope everyone is doing alright, and keeping the voice away.

lots of love

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hey sweetheart,

thank you!!

hope you're doing okay too sweetie??

let me know how things are going,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

Ye I'm doing fine at the mo. Had a couple of down times but thats only to be expected :)

I don't know if your on your holidays, but enjoy them if you are on them like me. I'm going away for a week with my mum, so I'll just see how things go.

love & best wishes

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hey sweetheart,

holidays have finished and so its back to work for me!

hope you have a fab holiday!!

take care,

lexy -xxx-

I read this post and it helped alot...I thought I was mad...I didn't know many others had that voice...I am not really sure what to call it though...?

its cunning

it knows my weaknesses

it says that I have to to be liked

if I don't, it keeps hassling me until I have had enough and I have to do it

and many more but I don't really have the time...i have to study for tests

any names come to mind? evil...?

I don't know...

anyway I am new to this and I started my own post...it seemed like the right thing to do! read it and please write back

prayers and wishes to all

...x

Thanx lexy I did have good holidays, back to school for me now .

way to recovery, The voice could be a snake. But that label would be a bit of an understatement to the hurt it causes.

love and wishes

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Mine is 'The jaffar' and at the moment he is very much there as much as I tell him to shut up! I need a remote with a mute button on it!!

hey sweetheart,

glad you had a good holiday.

how is school going for you?? I'm finding school incredibly stressful at the moment due to exams and other things that are going on.

let me know how things are going.

take care sweetheart,

lexy -xxx-

School is not too bad. I do have loads of test coming up, though it doesn't sound as stressful as it is for you.

I saw the paediatrician today, and he was pleased I'm going in the right direction. Still got a while to go, and I wont see him for 7 weeks- so he reckons I need at least that long of eating loads! I'm not so sure I do, and I'm happy how I am at the moment.

How are things on the food front for you?

Best wishes for your exams & hope things calm down a bit for you. Stay strong - and I knwo that's easier said than done.

love

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hey sweetheart,

glad to hear that school is not too bad and your peadiatrician is pleased with you! =)

things aren't great on the food front, or the mood front. I've been in bed for most of the past two days doing absolutely nothing as I have no energy to do anything and am feeling so down.

let me know how things are going,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

Hey, I'm new here but anywayz im a lad who is recovern frm an eatin disorder.

I think the 'name and shame' thing is a great creative idea.

Mine would have to be the sergeant..I know it sounds a bit sad but it relates well to my experience, as, like an army sergeant, th voice ordered me to do exercises relentlessly.

Of course I also suffered from major food problems, the exercises were what I hated; relentlessly exercising.

Anyway good luck to the rest of you, I think youz are doin gr8.

hey,

welcome to the boards =) everyone on here is lovely.

may I ask your story? you don't have to tell me if you don't want to.

always here if you ever need to talk/rant or anything else

let me know how things are going,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

My story? Well...in short...I had just started my GCSE year in school, I had loads of friends, achieved an average A grade and was a starter on the school rugby team- and its quite an exclusive school.

Anyway I was a tad overweight (with hindsight I was, but not by much) and decided to lose weight.

It began trivially; making healthier choices and doing more exercise. However over easter 2007 (my 15th bday) I got obsessed with going on a * bike ride. Then when back at school I stopped having lunch.

Then the * came. I isolated myself from my friends. And slowly I degenerated till the summer holidays.

Then my mam noticed- she would, as she has had the disease on 3 occasions, so she knew the signs. I got referred to a physchiatrist who banned me from my bike. And over that summer I started on my recovery.

I only avoided hospitalisation very very narrowly. Practically begging for another chance, but I just managed. Since then I have been trying to juggle recovering with my GCSEs and other stresses- needless to say I'm sure you know how hard it is, no?

My lowest weight was *, I am a lad who used to be a prop for a rugby team, so I suffered a big impact.

Thanks for asking Lexy07, I guess its good to share stories...

(Still got GCSEs in 2 weeks tho!)

you're welcome =)

your story sounds very similar to mine tbh. scarily so.

my mum also suffers with eating issues, and has done for many years.

I also only narrowly avoided becoming an inpatient, and was marginly overweight when my eating issues began. I then started eating healthily and exercising, and it just got out of hand.

I have my a levels in a couple of weeks too! (well all but one that I have to stay on another year to do because I missed all the coursework)

Hiya

and welcome to beat as well, I'm fairly new(ish) as well.

If you want to just rant you can do it to me as well, I hate it when you can't say how your feeling in case you hurt or distress the other person.. So just let it all out :)

I was similarly obsessed with exercising, and started doing running more often and harder sessions each time. I felt dreadful and tired but I felt unable to eat even the small amounts I was having if I didn't exercise.

I still exercise quite a lot, but its limited as to wht i can do and conditional on whether I put on any weight now. I actually enjoy the exercise now, and know I can (almost) go without it.

Good luck with your exams both of you, and I hope things get a bit more relaxed for you.

lots of love

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hey sweetheart,

thank you =)

let me know how things are going,

take care,

lexy -xxx-

I think my voice is like a *doll strange i know. It's like one of the 'mean girls' - looks lovely, but really wants to destroy you so they are the strongest, the best and the winner. But she tempts me thinking that i can become her, be beautiful and popular and perfect but actually this is a trap because everytime i complete something the goal gets bigger and harder to accomplish. She makes me believe i have to look perfect all the time and only eat in 'perfectly' or 'the right way' and if i do this i will be happy and people will like me and ill be able to cope with everything.

One day i will learn to stop believing her, see through the 'perfection' and learn to appreciate that it is what is on the inside that matters and what she tells me about myself is not true! She is only being horrible to make her stronger not me! I will cut off her hair, snap off her legs and throw her at the wall, out of the window and stamp on her... then maybe drown her at the bottom of a pond... the bury her... so i will never have to listen to it again!!

Wow lol that was a rant i wasn't expecting! Thanks for giving me the oppertunity to express that! Good luck everyone, take care,

best wishes,

Sarah xXx

I can relate to feeling the need to eat in 'the right way'. If I ate something that wasn't 'right' everything that I had after that would also be wrong. Even now 'the *' tells me what I can and can't have.

I am doing ok. I hve been off this week and having a good time. It was my bday, as well- no party food or * though! Ive decided not to hve a party  My mum says I can get a full body massage as a reward- but not having to eat extra food to put on weight will be just as much a reward. My mental state has still got a long way to go though :(.

How is everyone else getting on? (Sorry for yapping on, I might soon have an obsession for typing. lol :) )

Stay positive and love you all

(in a friends sort of way, naturally)

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hey sweetheart,

struggling quite a lot at the moment. =(

don't really know what to do with myself, but never mind ...

glad you've had a good week =)

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-

Heya,

im glad you can tell me, because I want to help but obviously cant do a lot. Just keep thinking that there are better times to come. You wont realise until things start easing up, but it will make it all the better when they do.

Stay strong and keep smiling :)

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Heya,

im glad you can tell me, because I want to help but obviously cant do a lot. Just keep thinking that there are better times to come. You wont realise until things start easing up, but it will make it all the better when they do.

Stay strong and keep smiling :)

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hey sweetheart,

thankyou =)

I hope so ....

I keep thinking that 'life will be better if I am smaller'. I don't even want happiness anymore =(

take care gorgeous,

lexy -xxx-