everything is going wrong and i just cant find any hope

im so sorry for ur loss hun

all i can say is u hav to tlk to sum1 about how u feel. Losing ur nan is obviously going to effect everything from ur exams to ur eating and its important you tlk to sum1 b4 it all builds up too much. Moving to the more specialised team will only benefit you if your concerned you must try and voice this.

Do you have a teacher or anyone at school you could go to see?

U do know that under the circumstances you could have a letter sent to the exam board explainin whats happend and wou would get consideration.

you have to think whats important to you and best for you

sitting the exams - its 3 in one day you would of already been mega stress now you have it alot harder - do you still sit them or do you do what you want to do and go to the funeral? bearing in mind AS exams can be sat in janruary aswel as resits - you wouldnt be failing you would be presponing untill you were stronger. The things i was told by the ppl on here when i sat my a levels and didnt know what to put first education or health - they said this - without your health you have no education as you wont be well enough to use it-

its a very hard position your in.

When i lost my dad i didnt grieve as i didnt know how or if it was allowd and in the end it came back n caused me more pain. thers no right or wrong way to feel - if you want to cry cry if you want to shout shout if you want to say goodbye go and say goodbye in your own way wether it be at the funeral or in your own way.

i think its better to deal with one thing at the time and i think its your choice what that is bearing in mind tho that without dealing with your loss your eating will be harder to deal with - no one will expect you to be able to stay strong about both things.

you have dissapointed no1 they know your tryin your best - if they didnt think you were tryin and wanted to recover they wouldnt be offering you the facilities to do so. dont give up please there is hope ther is light at the end i promise.

sorry ive rambled on and on and been preachy its just i feel links to what you say and how things werre for me im now doing extrememly well both in my eating and in life in genral but i couldnt of done it with out accepting things grieving and believing in myself and the help i got

take care im always here

lolly xx

hi i'm lollen,I'm 14 years old, i'm new...and i don't know what it's like to lose a nan or grandad-but i can imagine it must have been a shock-you must be feeling very empty like a piece of you has been taken away...i don't know-that's how i think i would feel. But just think-your nan is looking down at you from heaven-sitting in your pocket and she's ever so proud of you-when you get through all of this just remember...I did this for you nan and even more importantly for me.

Just keep smiling and be brave-your nan's with you

Lots of hugs Lollen xox

thanks so much for the support it really helps. i still hav no idea what to do and if what ever i chose will be the right decision but what ever i chose i know that i will ahve to live with and i feel that begining scared of the unknown is what i fear the most and having all of this upset lately has really shocked in mnay ways and in a positive way i think that my fear for the unkown and the uncontrolable may be what began or influced my ana in the first place so if i can deal with this then there is hope.

im so very sorry to hear about you dad my heart goes out to you. i can only begin to to image how u must of felt and knowning that you made it through that and dealing with ur ed makes me so determined to do it aswell. true inspiration. thank you

much love keep strong! xxx lydia xx